you know, whenever we do something...we should think of why we are doing it. when i started this blog, it was because i needed to remember and get things that were buried for so long out of my system.
i feel it has helped me do that a lot and but for a few more incidents that i cant forget, i have relayed most of those moments that would haunt me the most. and once they are out - it feels good to know i let them out.
my last few posts have been significantly different from the first few...anyone following this blog can see it. in fact, introducing phase 2 i think paints a different picture...one that shows the extent of succumbing to the relationship i experienced...I believe it is a survival mechanism when u feel u can no longer get out.
and truly - starting this blog was very much about me sharing the story bc i truly feel that its an under-reported and under-discussed reality.
...regardless...i wont lie. sometimes i ask myself why i am writing this. and even if writing helps me, why is this blog online? why am i writing this? what is my intention? are they pure intentions?
i dont know.
What is a pure intention? Better yet, what is an impure intention? Is purity like perfection? Or are you saying that because you aren't clear about your own motives, you are suspicious of yourself? Whatever those suspicions are, add them to your clear motives, they enrich and inform the clear motives the way that shades of meaning adhere to a word even when it's used for a single purpose. If you are enjoying it, go on enjoying it. I think you are a pleasure to read and furthermore you are contributing to the greater good. You might even help out some confused girl or boy who wants guidance.
ReplyDeleteI echo the previous commentater,
ReplyDelete"what is a purre intention?" You should tell your story in order to heal and in the process help others, inshallah. Writing is cathartic and writing for an audience is a way to bounce around ideas and recieve and offer support. Blogging is particularly nice because you may stay anonymous if you wish.
AsSalaam u Alaikum Sister
ReplyDeleteI read ur blog in an newspaper and appreciate u for being bold to upbring this experience of ur life.Sister i will pray for u that Allah(swt)give u strenght and keep u always on right path.Ameen.