A Reflecting Arab Muslim Girl From Around the Corner

Thursday, March 17, 2011

shut down.

“You shut down all feeling because you are trying to avoid the pain. It helps you get through the immediate crisis and the trauma. But if they persist, if they go on for a long time, they become a problem and you don‟t feel much of anything. You numbed yourself from the pain, but you stunted your feelings, your warmth and your joy.”

Maria Yellow Horse Brave Heart


  1. Hi Neighborhood Muslimah, I came through AltMuslimah. It's good you're talking about this. In general, abuse is kept secret. I understand your confusion, I've been reading through your blog and you pointed out that your uncle showered you with gifts.

    I'm not here to diagnose the situation or anything, but the showering of gifts and praise, it sounds like he was grooming you, so he could prepare you for sexual activity with him. That's usually how it begins. By doing that, he could get you to trust him.

    But just understand that what happened to you was not your fault. It's also good your writing about your experiences. :)

  2. I have gone through all your posts and I appreciate the way you have helped yourself and others by talking about your traumatic experience. your childhood had been snatched from you, you grew up as a confused person.you have been emotionally and physically abused for such a long period of time. But still you are brave and your trust in Allah is getting stronger.
    You are a ray of light for many young mums like me that they should always stand by their kids and do not let people ruin their lives.
    You deserve all the good wishes and prayers and a good life ahead. May Allah bless you.

  3. RenKiss - its been a long journey to finally realize that. The first step is learning to forgive yourself. Thank you for the comment.

    Ameen to your dua Anonymous. Jazakillah Kheir. Everything happens for a reason. The most important thing is for mothers and fathers to have open dialogue with their children.